Itumeleng Khune has finally come out in disclosing how severe the consequences of the non-renewal of his contract at Kaizer Chiefs affected him.
Khune is now without a club after Chiefs stuck to the decision of not handing him another extension, ending his playing career at the club.
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In the month – November – which marks a year since he last played 90 minutes at Chiefs, he has poured out his heart.
Khune confirms that he was asked by Chiefs to think about what route he intends taking but asked to be given more time to think about it and revert.
However, he hasn't done so to date as he negotiates his way into the business space, where he has real estate interests and is venturing into mining and betting.
"To be honest, I can't control how I feel the next morning," Khune responds to a question from KickOff.com, speaking after his announcement as a shareholder with TopBet at a function held in Bryanston.
"I always wake up feeling different, especially the first couple of weeks after I had meetings with the club.
"It wasn't easy for me to digest the news.
"I stayed in bed for two straight weeks crying every day, not understanding what was happening, yet I was given the respect by the club to say: 'Itu, come and let us have a sit-down and this is the plan for the club going forward and unfortunately you are not part of it as a footballer'.
"So, I just couldn't believe my ears when I heard the sad news.
"Like I said, I want to play until I'm 40+ and it couldn't happen.
"I'm still hopeful, but again, you can't control the heart.
"Every morning I wake up, I have a different feeling, I feel like I can go back tomorrow and play.
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"The following day I wake up with pains everywhere on my body, then I will feel like: 'Nah, it is fine, let us leave everything as is'.
"But like I said, the passion and love for the game is still there and I think, and not I think, I can still deliver whenever I'm called upon.
"The Denis Onyangos of this world are still doing it, so what is stopping me from doing it when I'm two years younger?," says Khune, confirming he has not been approached by any other club and hasn't seen himself wearing another jersey.